Can you find your purpose? Can you define your purpose? Is there only one ultimate purpose? What if you never find your purpose? Is purpose overrated anyway?
Are some questions that keep me up at night.
After a five-day fever that hollowed me out, I woke up only to find that I have lost my mojo. I feel purposeless at the moment. I tried to reassure myself: we'll get back to regular programming, tend to our purpose, and everything will be fine in Ishitaland. But reality smacked me in the face and I had the biggest realisation ever - I don't have the much-coveted…purpose. SHITE.
This was worrying. Everything I do is so systematized. How did I forget to define my purpose? That which kickstarts so many things, gives creativity a why, breathes life into ideas, helps you stand tall. How am I to survive without it?
I scuffled, shuffled, and scuttled simultaneously, shuddering at the thought of confronting my lack of purpose. Did I write it down and misplace it? Was it an heirloom recipe I forgot to collect from my mom? I searched everywhere - coat pockets, winter trunks, drawers, folders. ALAS, nothing. Where is it? :’(
I started voraciously reading research papers even. The madness! Here are my findings:
“A sense of purpose in life, a central component of well-being, is one promising candidate; it refers to the extent that people see their lives as having a sense of direction and goals that are anchored in core values” (Frankl, 2006; McKnight & Kashdan, 2009; Ryff, 2014).
Victor Frankl suggests that higher purpose leads to a greater will to live, which motivates people to endure short-term discomfort in exchange for longer-term rewards. Thus, people with higher purpose might make healthier behavioral decisions with more cognitive ease.
Hmm. Right. So, it’s in all our interests to find “purpose”. Or is it?
A different perspective
A fellow writer recently posted saying - "I want to know more of how you do life, not how to do life" - and that made me reflect on why I started this newsletter. It began as a "How to" guide for life experiments, helping you make time for things that matter most. It evolved into something I thought my readers would love to read. But that goal post is always shifting.
And I never delved into how I actually live, my philosophies, my ideal life. My... purpose. So let me take you through some of my thoughts instead of a “how to”.
Hello procrastination: my best friend
I've long battled procrastination, for as long as I can remember I wanted to get rid of it. But I've had an epiphany. I now know, I wasn't postponing tasks out of fear; they simply didn't ignite my creativity or provide satisfaction of completing a task at hand. So, I self-admonished.
This has been a larger theme in my life: Avoid uninspiring work. Now this hasn't always served me well in traditional terms - I could have had more money, better job titles if I hadn’t bounced from the big cities and actively said no to many opportunities that people would kill to have, simply because I chose to lead a remote life on my own terms.
But it's definitely kept a fire burning in my belly, a quest for meaning. I've grappled with purpose - my reason for being, my higher calling, my place in the spectrum of mediocrity to greatness. And so meaning-making and daydreaming became my constant companions.
I devoured quotes like Mark Twain's: "The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why."
I believed I needed to uncover my "why" to know what to do. This nascent understanding led me to explore widely a range of topics I would love to dabble in apart from work. I am still in that phase, I don’t think I am coming out of feeding my curiosity any time soon. Neither should you.
Work, Life, and the Search for Meaning
This search for meaning was so strong, it shaped my approach to life, especially work. I never took jobs too seriously - just enough to pay bills and maintain a respectable title. Surprisingly, this worked. The more casual my attitude, the easier it became to detach. My self-esteem wasn't tied to my job. Work drama? I stayed zen. I took leaves freely to travel and nourish my soul without thinking twice. I never took things personally and developed empathy for those who lived for their work.
I even pitied them at times, I have to be honest with you. A close friend breaks her back for validation and money, blurring work-life boundaries. I struggle to understand this work-centric mindset. I know why people do it, it’s just I've never been one of them. The idea of pedestaling a day job feels deeply dissonant to me. Those who know me well can attest to this. Essentially, finding purpose in “corporate work” was never meant for me. The more I tried, the more shallow it all started to feel. Certainly, making money for corporates cannot be why I was put on this earth? Yuck.
Embracing Our Many Selves
I firmly believe we all have multiple personalities. And I strongly believe suppressing these from blooming leads to internal conflict. It will eat you up sooner than later. My view might seem skewed, even prudish, but I stand by it.
I'm sharing this because the nature of work as we know it today is evolving rapidly.
My prediction: those honoring their creative calling now will reap extraordinary future rewards. The future of traditional work is changing more rapidly that one might be able to keep up with. I have many things to say on this front as I have been studying the landscape of work for long, because I wanted to know what can I do to break free from the traditionalism of it all.
So, here's my appeal: Discover your many beautiful personalities. Nurture them. Create a portfolio of careers (h/t to
& ) that aligns with these diverse aspects of yourself. If this sounds too good to be true, it's because corporate culture has conditioned us to accept golden handcuffs. Breaking free is challenging, I know you feel me. But it’s possible.For starters, feed your curiosities. Feed your creativity.
There’s no such thing as creative people and non creative people.
There’s just people who see their creativity and people who don’t. And not using it doesn’t go without penalty.
As it turns out, unused creativity is not benign, it’s dangerous.
-Brené Brown
Instead of seeking one overarching purpose, cultivate multiple avenues for self-expression and meaning.
And that's what I've come to realize at this point, in this season of my life: my purpose is to embrace my multifaceted self. To explore whether helping others become the best versions of themselves can be fulfilling enough for me to discover my own (perhaps never-existing) purpose. I am not afraid of the unknown anymore.
Some ideas for you to explore:
→ Don’t get guilt tripped: If you are like me and don’t feel ignited to do work that is not appealing, don’t marinate in your guilt. There’s a deeper truth there: transform procrastination from a source of guilt into a tool for creativity and self-discovery. Use the time you'd typically spend procrastinating as a deliberate space for unstructured thinking and exploration. During these times, allow yourself to follow your curiosity without judgment. Keep a journal of insights, ideas, or new interests that emerge during these sessions.
→ Challenge the notion of work-life balance by intentionally blurring the lines between work, play, and personal growth. Seek ways to infuse creativity and personal meaning into all aspects of life, including traditional work. This story of a bus driver inspired me beyond words.
Identify one aspect of your day job that you find uninspiring. Brainstorm ways to approach it creatively or connect it to your personal interests. Experiment with these approaches for a month and reflect on how it impacts your sense of purpose and job satisfaction.
And keep an eye out for upcoming dispatches as I uncover more truths in this realm. It is after all, the premise for this newsletter. To reimagine work, life and everything in between. We have the biggest power - to imagine!
→ There is no one definite purpose: Instead of seeking an individual purpose, focus on creating meaningful connections. Purpose can emerge from shared experiences and mutual growth.
For instance, my fascination with mushrooms connected me to the mycophile community. This shared interest has led to enriching personal connections, engaging reading, and new friendships, especially after attending India's first mushroom festival last year. It's become a fulfilling shared purpose.
Closing thoughts:
As I try to answer those initial questions about purpose, perhaps we can see them in a new light? The search for purpose, with all its twists and turns, might be a purpose in itself (wow a reframe, I love it).
Our multiple personalities, our creative callings, our resistance to traditional work structures - these aren't distractions from our purpose, but integral parts of it.
Can we find our purpose? Maybe it's not about finding, but creating.
Can we define it? Perhaps it's fluid, changing as we grow.
Is there only one ultimate purpose? Our multiple personalities suggest otherwise.
What if we never find our purpose? Then we'll have lived a life rich with exploration and meaning.
Is purpose overrated? Maybe, but the journey of questioning and seeking is invaluable.
In embracing the paradox of purpose - the simultaneous search for and creation of meaning - we open ourselves to a life of authentic expression, creativity, and growth.
And isn't that, in itself, purposeful? :)
Until next Sunday,
Ishita
xx
P.S. If you enjoyed this dispatch, please click on the heart at the bottom or the top of this email. It helps others discover Masters Of Fate. And makes me super happy! :)
Now I’m wondering about purpose and calling. What about being of service? Is that our purpose as humans? Do we have an individual purpose or is it collective? Have we been conditioned into thinking we have a purpose that’s individual?
Your piece has got me thinking!
I think about this a lot too. What if our purpose is to learn to be fully present? To take all the pressure to find our purpose away? At the same time I’m infinitely curious about future visions that bring me joy and practicing moving toward them with peaceful presence. Thanks for this I loved it ❤️